Jack of all trades.
Master of plenty. Chooser of few.
It’s been a while since I wrote. I know some of the people who read this know me and therefore, there is a vulnerable point to share more than what I’d like. For the last six months, I’ve reiterated how much writing has saved me. But today, it feels like a burden. I am not sure how to gather my thoughts because there is just too much going on at once. The best way I am making sense of it all is the following:
“When you ask God for patience, He won’t give you patience. He will put you in situations that teach you patience.”
“When you ask God how to love better, He won’t give you just love. He will place you around people that will teach you to love better.”
So on and so forth. So I ask God for resilience and strength so that I may withstand what is to come. He is for sure giving me the whole book to learn. (You can chill now…)
I’ve asked God to fulfill me and to help me navigate towards stability. I forgot that I am already stable. What I seek is to be free. What I seek is the opportunity to know myself better. What I seek is to rejoice in the current while knowing that if there are days I feel like I am drowning, I can swim up.
The last few months have been a true test of how much I can do, and how well. I am in a period of transition. Transitions require shedding. I do a lot. I do most things well. But I cannot do them all. I no longer want to do them all. I also do not think I can be it all to everyone. Who is replenishing my cup when I am consistently filling up everyone else’s? I am now certain that it is no one’s responsibility but mine to create my own happiness. And in every painful moment, in every disappointment, in every thing that we may think is so severe and burdening, there is redirection. We do not go through what we think are hard times for the sake of feeling pain. We surmount the pain to rejoice in the blessings. It’s a difficult lesson, that is taking me time to understand.
I will leave you early today with the following words:
Above all, love yourself. The way you treat others is a reflection of who you are and how you feel. Do not go and hurt God’s children because you have not dealt with yourself. To love is to heal.
Find what truly makes you happy. I have so many interests, so many areas that I get involved in and that I am knowledgeable about. A Jack of all trades. To be successful is to be focused. Find what you are good at, and what your strengths are. And invest in them. It will either bring you health or wealth.
Do not stay where you are no longer growing. It’s easier to choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven. And yet, we know that one is better than the other. Growing pains aren’t easy. But they still make you grow. Go on and expand!
Somehow, writing this helped more than I thought. The conflicts and busy times of life won’t win. Because I do.
Until later!
Mel